Encouraging the Writer, Part 2
First I want to thank everyone for privately emailing me about sources for local, raw honey. I have found some and am making arrangements to fill up my five gallon bucket for a reasonable price. I want to gather these referrals for honey and post them in the near future for your benefit.
Also, I made an error in my recipe for my bread on Friday. I noticed it on Saturday and fixed it, but wanted to point it out if you printed it out on Friday. Instead of four eggs, you need to use eight eggs. It is a typo with consequences. I want you to reproduce the good loaves of bread that I made so please make sure that you have the right amount of eggs in the recipe.
A while ago, I published an essay written by my son, Clayton. The purpose of posting it was to encourage him. “Encourage the writer, don’t critique the writing,” is a mantra that I repeat to myself silently as I educate my children. In other words, I pay attention to the content and thoughts and not the grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc. There is a reason that even great authors have editors. Clayton is a gifted writer with a vivid imagination and an incredible vocabulary. And, I am not just saying it because I am his mama.
In another attempt to encourage him, I want to post his first draft of the beginning section of a short story he is currently writing. I hope that you enjoy it and will leave him positive feedback. Keep in mind that Clayton is fifteen years old.
The Fall of Lucifer
by Clayton Holliday
There they were, standing on the edge of the Gate. Gazing at the sunset at the end of yet another day, the angels of God stood on the brink of the realm of man. The sunlight made their armor shine and its last warm rays hit the angels in the face like a gentle breeze. As the last shimmer of light faded and darkness crept in, artificial light started to spring up in its wake. One of the angels, Gabriel, spared a quick glance at the humans. Strange creatures these humans are. Always fighting each other for “world domination,” but ironically they have not and never will succeed. Driven by their greed, selfishness, and pride, all seeds of Lucifer, they muster on to no avail. Their ignorance will lead to their doom.
Lucifer was once high in the ranks of angels, covered with precious stones, and with the seal of perfection but his pride made him boastful. Drunk with vanity, he challenged the power of God. Like the humans today, he wanted more power, as did several others, and they soon mutinied. The angels of God, and those who followed Lucifer, fought in a great battle in the Heavens. Lucifer’s army were soon forced to surrender and brought before the Almighty to account for their actions. The courtroom had not, and hasn’t since been used for the judgment of immortals. The roof was domed, with great pillars at its base. In the center was a silver chair with intricate designs, surrounded by rows and rows of seats that seemed to sparkle in the light of God. There Lucifer sat and his hatred grew stronger.
The room seemed empty, but soon, the seats were being filled with glowing angels. The sound of chains and the moans of the unfaithful filled the air. They were stripped of their jewels and walked in shame to their seats beside their “leader”. As soon as all were seated, an overpowering flash and the sound of ten thousand storms erupted from thin air over the judicial throne. And there sat God, towering over the rest. At the sight of Him, every angel, including Lucifer, rose from their seat, dropped to one knee, and bowed. In a voice like a waterfall, He spoke to Lucifer, “You, my unfaithful servant, have caused me great strife by acting against me in such a manner as this. Your pride has cost you and your followers dearly. You and your followers are hereby banished from this realm!”
As soon as the Almighty finished speaking, a giant crack split the ground beneath Lucifer and his angels, or the devil and the Fallen as they were known thence forth. They started to sink and soon, were falling into Hades and to Earth. As Lucifer fell through the layers of the atmosphere, he saw that he was drifting toward the Garden of Eden. And so the seed of evil was planted in God’s garden. Lucifer woke and found himself alone in the perfect garden, full of forever-ripened fruits and vegetables. He sat up and took in his surroundings, which was a feast for the eyes. He found himself famished and took an apple from a nearby tree. Lucifer expected a mouthful of sweet fruit, but found that it had become rotten in his palm. Even in the Garden of Eden, he was still punished.
Lucifer continued to wander through the garden, searching for the slightest morsel to eat, but there was none that didn’t rot at his touch. He was feed only by his pride, anger, and greed. Stripped of his splendor, the only nourishment that sustained him was his drive to avenge that which he had lost. He planned and plotted to get even. As he wandered aimlessly, the only sound that accompanied him was the sound of his own footsteps. As the day went by, birds and fish sprang forth into being. The silence broke as the sound of birds playing, filled in the air. While they swooped and glided between the trees, Lucifer watched in amazement. When they saw him, they stopped and grew quiet. He continued to walk until he found a stream, filled with fish darting back and forth. As they saw him, they too grew still. And so silence crept in again.
As a second day passed, beasts walked upon the earth. Lucifer grew jealous as he watched them devour fruits and berries, as well as grass and the leaves of the trees. Infuriated, he began to think of ways to use them against God himself. As he thought, Lucifer heard an unfamiliar sound. It grew louder as it came closer. Curious, Lucifer jumped into the nearest tree and watched from an overhanging branch. The sound’s origin walked upright on two legs. It was hairless and strong. As it talked, the animals seemed to listen. “This must be Man,” he thought to himself, for he was made in God’s image.
Great story! I do love it!
We got our seed potatoes and onion sets. Part of the garden is tilled, not for it to dry out some so we can plant. When hubby was tilling yesterday, he got the tiller buried in the wet ground. LOL I want it to dry out some so we can get the potatoes and onions in.
We have buds on our apple trees and the fig tree. Blooms are on the peach trees. I haven’t checked the pear or plum trees yet, but will soon. I want to get 2 cooking apple trees planted this year. I am leaning toward granny smiths. Any other suggestions?
Lara, at the beginning of this article you said, “Keep in mind that Clayton is 15 years old.” That being said, I was certainly not expecting the story that I was reading to be so deep. What an amazing use of the pen. I saw swept away and lost in deep thought as I was reading a story that seems to have been written by a much older man, and not a young man, 15 years of age. I do believe we have another very talented writer in our family. Hugs and kisses to you Clayton…keep up the FANTASTIC work.