Gone From My Sight
My mama with baby Andrew.
This is not a very upbeat article. I know that before I even begin. Last August my grandfather passed away. When he died, he took us by surprise. My grandmother has been afflicted with Parkinson’s disease for over two decades. We always suspected that she would go first.
Joyce Holliday is one of my most favorite people in all the world. Since I am the oldest grandchild, I have had the privilege of knowing her for a long time. Out of my cousins, I have the most fond memories of her before Parkinson’s trapped her spirit in her body.
I remember her hula hooping with me outside. She would tap dance in her foyer on the tile floor. She would even do cart wheels in the yard. She was a very active wife and mother of four.
She taught me to cook. I converted her recipes to wheat-free ones in my book, Texas Homesteader Wheat-Free Cookbook. She was an amazing cook.
As we have witnessed her gradual decline, it has been hard. The hardest part is knowing that my children will not have the memories of her that I have. I tell them stories all the time so that when they see her they will not be afraid of the feeble, hard to understand person before them. Most importantly I tell them the stories so that her spirit and her beauty will play a role in my children’s lives.
Parkinson’s disease is absolutely awful. I would not wish it on my worst enemy. It is cruel to the person as well as to the family. It robs one of his/her abilities and eventually any quality of life. It is evil.
Hospice is now helping us cope with her situation. They gave us a booklet to read about the dying process. This booklet is very informative and easy to read. My uncle called it a “commercial break read.” That is about how long it would take you to read the whole thing.
Gone From My Sight: The Dying Experience by Barbara Karnes is a must-read for anyone watching a loved one die from natural causes. It would not be useful for those who die from an accident. Ms. Karnes is a registered nurse, who apparently has witnessed so many deaths that she was able to compile a booklet to explain the process of dying.
If you are going through something similar as my family, then try to find this book to read. You only need one copy since it is so short. You can pass it around to your family members.
If you could find it in your hearts, please pray for my grandmother, Joyce. We are asking for peace and comfort for her. Pray for our family, too. It is hard to lose family members regardless of the circumstances. Also, pray to find a cure for the horrendous Parkinson’s disease.
Thank you, Lara for sharing your heart. August was two years that we lost my father-in-law from Parkinson’s. It was horrific…and we weren’t even there every day to see him.
He was diagnosed in our first year of marriage so I never knew him without it. My children never had a grandfather that could do all those grandfatherly things with them. (My father died when my oldest was five.)
Dad fought a long (21 years), hard battle but he won the victory as he now has a new body in heaven. How anyone can go through what our family (more his wife and daughter) went through without Jesus, is incomprehensible.
My heart goes out to you and I will definitely pray for your family.
God’s blessings,
Carol
My prayers are with your grandmother and your family. Peace be with you all.
Thank you for sharing your story with me. You are right when you say, “he won the victory as he now has a new body in heaven.” Thinking about how free she will be when she does pass brings me much comfort.
What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful person, both inside and out. She is still the most amazing person that I know. Please continue to share the stories of Mama with your children, though there are way to many to recall. I can only hope that I am half the Mother that she still is, continuing to teach us daily. She loves us all so very much, just like I love you.
Dear Lara — thanks for sharing! I am glad that you have memories of when your grandmother was vital (and it sounds like she was a lot of fun)! I have listened to 2 of my grandchildren talk about Peg that way — and it is sad. I believe that the hardest thing we have to do in life is to let go. I also believe that God gives us the gift of memory for our healing. Keep telling your children your memories because they will become a part of their stories also. Love & Blessings, Wes <